Meditation & Self-Help Kick

I am always willing to try new things, be it fashion trends or the latest binge-worthy show, but I am also always slow to take the initial plunge. More often than not, I end up absolutely loving whatever it is, it just takes forever to get started.

My current interest in is meditation and self-help books. You can say I am on a regular “kick” with these two. I cannot get enough of reading my favorite bloggers’ experiences with trying meditation or their recommendations for the latest self-help bestseller. This week I have taken the plunge, finally, after what seems like months of pumping myself up to start!

Currently, I have started the free basic starter pack of guided meditations on the app Headspace and I am 2 hours into the audiobook recording of 10% Happier. 10% Happier is written (and thankfully voiced by) by journalist Dan Harris, and reads more like a memoir than self-help. This being my first real experience reading self-help, I appreciate the insight into his life and how it led him to meditation. Also, I am loving it even more because I have always had a thing for broadcast journalism (I mean… you’re looking at the lead anchor of my elementary school’s news program). I can give a more comprehensive review once I’ve finished, but I am hooked so far (only a couple train rides into it)! I am also really excited to read Presence and a slew of other highly recommended reads.

As for Headspace, this is my first time even giving meditation a go. I am jumping in rather blindly, as I’m not even sure I know exactly what meditation is. I am on Day 5 and so far feeling a little panicky while doing it, probably not the best vibe to start with but it is true. Focusing on your breath is the bread and butter of meditation and for some reason it makes me panicked. I have asthma and it is the height of fall allergy season after all, so that probably doesn’t help, but I am hoping as I progress in the sessions that the strange panic starts to wane.

Which brings me to my “why” for picking up meditation and the quest to better myself. 

Hi, I’m Kaitlin and I’m a nervous, high strung person. 

I’m Type A and Type B through Z all in one, flustered package. My blood pressure sky rockets for the littlest of things in life and my inner voice can be super negative to me and everyone around me. To outsiders though, I can be a pure optimist and a rather easy going gal… I’m conflicted to say the least. While I can navigate the waters of being equal parts cynic and optimist for the most part, my nerves and anxiety have always weighed me down. Ever since I was wee lass, I would get myself so worked up about things (mainly, EXCITING fun things) that I would make myself truly sick. Vacations? Fun events with family? I’d be so gut-wrenching sick that I couldn’t even enjoy myself. I shouldn’t even make this sound like it happened in the past, it still does! In the last year or so, particularly with all our wedding festivities, I actually have been able to control it better. I’m not even sure what did the trick, but I’ve been able to have an internal dialogue with myself to rationalize and calm the eff down. I’m still struggling though, in a way that is more constant (though, luckily, less consuming). This constant, low-level of anxiety is what I want to tackle head on, through meditation. And as a young adult who has always been very ambitious, I want to make some changes as I continue to climb to career ladder.

I am excited to share this journey with you all. And please reach out to me to let me know your path in meditation or self-help - I’d love to hear what is guiding you and what is working!

Until next time…

Kaitlin